And I keep thinking last year has only just gone…

Thinking it Over

Thinking It Over

Well I never… Time has passed me by unknowingly once again. I swore to myself last time that I would make at least two blog posts a month. Being devoid of an interesting source of inspiration everyday, and without the will-power to actually write everyday, when my degree revolves around that very thing, seemed rather a tall order. I don’t know how some bloggers do it and still have time to find the inspiration, and keep it interesting!

But, the inevitable and merciless nature of time has meant it has been three months since my last post. As a result I don’t really think I can call myself much of a blogger, more of an ‘occasional-when-there’s-nothing-else-to-do-at-all’ sort. I really should move it up on my list of priorities  though, because I find it helpful in letting the little rants I have to myself out to the world.

For example this year I’ve thought about patriotism, philanthropy and misanthropy, self-worth and other rubbish like morals of terrorism and hypocrisy within policies against terrorism. These things matter to me, though I doubt to many of you they do quite so much that my brain sometimes can’t comprehend all the loose ends of arguments I have with myself in my head. It is truly a mind-boggling thing, this thing we call life. If I had actually materialised these thoughts into a tangible piece of writing, it probably would have made an – albeit very poor – attempt at a full-length dissertation.

Well anyway, this was intended to be just a quick post to let you faithful readers know I haven’t given up, or crawled away into a shrivelled ball and died, or anything else for that matter,

I’m just one lazy sh*t.

The main reason I write today is because even though I’m  not a massive fan of writing essays for my course, obviously (who is), I have just submitted them all for this term (best feeling in the world) and am somehow not satisfied by the 12,000 words of writing I’ve done this term anyway… I maybe have more of a writer in me than I think!

I can’t honestly believe it’s nearly the end of 2012 either… what… where… why?! I know I’m not the only one to still consider my year of birth (1991) to be only ten years ago… I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

I’m not making any promises, I have a couple of ranty-type posts in the works which I need to finish, but if the world ends on the 21st I wont have anything to write anyway. So it goes.

Here’s to more will-power  in 2013 – that’s something we all need before those futile resolutions!

Edited 28/01/2013

Excitement and apathy

Crikey, it’s been a while since I last wrote, a whole month in fact. Apologies to those who faithfully follow my blog (haha), I’m sure you’ve been eagerly pining for my return.

Well, this is only a quick one, I’m afraid. I won’t do you the injustice of not explaining my absence though. My reasons are fairly pathetic, ironic, or valid, depending on who you are. Basically it is that time of the term again where essays need to be written. Those arseholes of essays. The use of the not-so-harsh-as-one-that-might-have-been word ‘arseholes’ there might have been because I was seeking a word better tuned to my new found love-hate relationship with the relentlessly merciless intellectual enlightenment form. Yes, I did just imply I don’t actually have too great a problem with essay writing. Why? It isn’t just because the only thrills in my life at the moment are looking forward to the time when the central heating comes on, or when I discover a half-drunk stale Fosters buried in the fridge. Although I am currently writing two four-thousand word essays at a time, which might initially sound like an extraordinary act of insanity, I promise I haven’t resorted to jumping from a fifth storey window or drunkenly crashing my car into a lake yet. This is because I have worked out an ingenious and highly efficient system to in fact minimise the impact essay writing has on my life. Because after all, I’m so busy all the time, being a student and all.

I am going to bore you with the details, since I am ironically procrastinating writing essays today. Ha. According to my somewhat limited mathematical skills, I have calculated that if I start writing a month before the deadline I only need to write 133 words per essay per day. This means I can ramble and bullsh*t for all of about half an hour (it does take that long to write that many words thanks to having to sift through piles of text to try and find some random quote from some radical intellectual which instantly makes personal arguments completely valid, no matter how much other bullsh*t they contain) and then continue on with my life. As it happens, I normally average more than this per day, meaning I have nearly finished both essays, some twenty days before the deadline. Yesss.

Despite this, this time around I have picked questions which I actually find more stimulating than watching anti-climb paint dry. For one module, I am writing about people who write about writing itself, which, after five minutes or so, makes my head explode. For the other, I am writing about the butch-ness of Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) in the Alien films. At least with regards to her nearly being semi-naked and waltzing around shooting phallic sadistic aliens with massive guns in the first two films, nearly makes something else explode. Say no more.

I can see this is quickly becoming a not-quick post, but I’m not going to go back and edit it or delete bits, because, quite frankly, you should be interested in every aspect of my massively exciting life. With regards to the short story, I will admit it has rather taken a place on the back burner, writing 266 academic words of an essay a day takes a phenomenal toll on one. It will, inevitably be released, and it will, inevitably, no matter how much time I end up spending on it, be utter rubbish.

Anyways, there’s not much more to say… of course, having about -£500 in the bank, I don’t have much else going on, although last Friday night, of which I mostly cannot remember, must have been a particularly exciting night, because on Saturday  I awoke in an incredibly awkward contorted position and aching in places I never even knew could ache.

Perhaps I should go back to watching anti-climb paint dry after all.

When something next happens in my hectic and chaotic life, you’ll be the first to know.

Peace.

Stephen King watch out…

Maserati GranTurismo

Beast. My beast.

Well it’s nearly one whole month into 2012 and it still feels like only yesterday (to use the much overused but increasingly meaningful in older-age cliché) that I was dissapointingly only vaguely intoxicated on New Year’s Eve.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, mine would end up being counter-productive, at least that’s the thought I comfort myself with completely hiding the fact it would actually be down to my inadequate willpower. Rather a subtle ambition I have is to at least at some point this year take my interest and passion in one of my fields of interest one step further, so to speak. Since flying planes is ludicrously expensive, and believing I have the resources to purchase either an Aston Martin DBS or a Maserati GranTurismo S would be slightly insane, my most realistic option at present is writing. I have decided I can have at least some arbitrary corporeal elements of all my interests merged into one, which is the “immaterial” medium of writing. Since those interests which require the use of, manipulation, or acquisition of material items normally requires money, and presenting my feelings for these interests in writing, which apart from the ink itself, any interpretation is purely mental, but which most importantly is always free, writing is indeed the way forward… and already I am rambling. See, must be talent there somewhere.

So, in short, I have decided I am going to write a short story about something or other whenever I feel like it. It will normally be about stuff I care about or something completely different about which I may or may not care but still feel the need to write about. It may even turn autobiographical… but don’t expect any revealing secrets!

Anyways, I am so f*cking knackered, my eyes actually feel like planets, and it’s only 11pm. What has my life become?! So to finalise you can expect this so far random-natured and slightly dreary example of writing to get at least a tiny bit more interesting in future.

I am sure you’re thrilled to learn this fact.

Back to reality

Greetings.

A happy New Year to you all.

Just a quick one today, as I can’t really bring myself to write an essay at the moment. Hope you’ve all had a fat, lazy and indulgent Christmas and can remember at least some of New Year’s Eve! I didn’t write at all over Christmas because for the first time in a long time I have genuinely been busy so that I have felt tired in the evenings not because I have stayed up for 27 hours being idle, procrastinating and wilfing; and procrastinating over wilfing, but because from the actual crack of dawn I have been up and actually doing stuff. How things change! Since the first week of me being home I’ve been working. Working in a warehouse. Working my arse off more than ever it seems – I am going to be utterly zombified when I return to Uni! Ah well, it’s all part of the many fibres in the rich tapestry of life.

It seems only right to talk briefly about both the cultural memes that everyone talks about this time of year, and also those specific to this year, in fact. New Years resolutions? None. There, that’s the first one over with. One of my things in life nowadays is try to have few regrets, we learn something from everything we do, and unless we’re stupid, the lessons we learnt will mean we won’t do that thing again. Or we will be technically ‘insane.’ Also, 2012 is supposedly, to those who are of either a more gullible or less rational nature, the last year in all of time. So why not live it like our last? But shouldn’t we do that every year; since no one knows when they are going to die? I can tell you for one, if the world does end this year, it won’t be due to the designers of the Mayan calendar running out of parchment or sensibly thinking that their civilisation could not possibly survive for over a thousand years, nor them being restrained by the physical impossibility of writing to infinity, but it will be because of the breeding of stupid people.

Anyway, I’m off to make some lunch.

Essays can do one

So it’s been a while, just thought I’d post something quickly, since it’s 2:28am on a Friday night/Saturday morning and I should be out forgetting everything that makes any sense and getting off my/on someone else’s tits. But I am not. Because my student loan doesn’t quite cover it this year. Oh dear. Oh dear indeed.

Don’t worry, my silence doesn’t in fact mean I’m dead. Nope, the reality is I’ve been stuck doing essays since about two weeks ago, and boy had I forgotten how much I detest them, actually with a passion. Having to do four at the same time is a bigger pain in the arse than a telegraph pole. Not to worry, I’ve genuinely been sad and/or OCD enough to mathematically calculate precisely the minimum amount of words I can write per day and still finish all my essays before the deadline.

I far prefer writing in this ranting, pointless manner on a blog rather than in an organised structured manner which has to agree with other writers directly, and hence to me is equally pointless, but I’m not getting in to debt for nothing!

Anyways, any suggestions for something relevant/vaguely interesting to write about when it’s not stupid o’clock would be appreciated for next time around.

 

Laters all.